Top Ten Stories Of 2016

I’m not saying you’ll agree with these. In fact, you probably won’t, but then again, it’s not your list, is it? So it’s with that in mind that I present to you the Official Desert Musings Top Ten News Events List of 2016:

10. RUSSIA AIDS SYRIA IN CIVIL WAR: Well, the US wasn’t going to wade into this one, not with a chicken for a president. And Syria’s forces would be fighting the rebels until Armageddon if Vladimir Putin hadn’t stepped in. The result? America once again was shown to be a feckless leader on the world stage thanks to its feckless leader in the White House, and Bashar al Assad got to stay in power. In fact, it was so bad that Secretary of State, John Kerry wasn’t even invited to the negotiations to discuss the Aleppo cease-fire! He found out about it six days before it happened, and was pissed nobody called him. John, they don’t call losers to the big boy table!

9. ID THEFTS: Oh, it wasn’t just your bank, or your favorite department store that got hacked this year. The federal government couldn’t protect its own employees. And Yahoo couldn’t prevent its users from being hacked either…not just once but twice. In fact, over 30% of the planet had their identities put at risk to be stolen because of hackers this year. No one was immune…worse yet, no one had any answers.

8. RENEWED CUBAN RELATIONS: It wasn’t all good news, depending on which side of the Cuban situation you were on. If you lived in Little Havana, it was definitely bad news. But under Obama’s guidance, the US re-opened relations, and an embassy with Cuba’s dictatorial leadership. Some people are even flying into Havana now for the first time in almost 60 years. Apparently, they can’t get enough of those 1950 style cars here in the United States!

7. THE OLYMPICS: The rumors that swirled regarding the Olympics in Rio were that the terrorists would attack, the venues were in terrible disarray and that the pollution in Brazil would choke a mule. They managed to get the Olympic games off, with only minor hitches…the biggest one seemed to be a few US athletes that wanted to trash a convenience store and got caught.

6. CLEVELAND CAVALIERS: The Cavs did the unthinkable this year, beating the Golden State Warriors for their first NBA title, and allowing LeBron James to give his adopted hometown of Cleveland (he’s actually from Akron) a championship that he was unable to provide the first time he was in town. The town, noted for its exceptionally bad sports teams, went nuts, as you’d expect!

5. CHICAGO CUBS: The Cubbies had been under a curse for over 100 years. Something to do with a goat not being allowed into the stadium to watch a ballgame. And they had become one of the worst franchises in terms of winning championships in sports history. That was rectified this year, when the Cubs beat (who else?) the Cleveland Indians for the World Series they’ve chased for so long!

4. IRAN NUCLEAR DEAL: It’s been called by people a lot smarter than me as the worst foreign policy deal in US history. The United States in an attempt to cement something that Barack Obama could hang his hat on that wasn’t an absolute abortion in the foreign policy world, decided this was it. Iran immediately took over $150 billion in cash, the US released all of the sanctions, as did the rest of the world, and Iran resumed its “Death To America” chant. Who were the real chumps here?

3. TERROR ATTACKS ACROSS THE WORLD: If anyone doesn’t think we are in a Holy War with Extremist Islam, they either are the most naïve people in the world, or the stupidest. From California to Florida, to Italy, to Belgium, to Germany, to France, the world was on fire with terrorist plots, and seemed unable to do anything to stop it…except keep letting Middle East refugees who have been the guilty parties in many of the attacks, to keep entering their countries. Smooth move, huh?

2. BREXIT: It was a very foretelling vote. The British people voted this past summer for England to leave the European Union. It was met with derision among the Europeans, who saw it as a slap in the face of the continent. But in the end analysis, it was only an omen of things to come. Globalists should have realized that their age has come and gone without so much as a whimper.

1. THE UNITED STATES PRESIDENTIAL ELECTION: What was supposed to be the coronation of Hillary Clinton as America’s first female president, turned into one of the largest political upsets in US history, certainly equaling that of “Dewey Defeats Truman”. Donald Trump, who the polls had as trailing by 5% as late as the day before the election took the Electoral College in stunning fashion, winning the election, and leaving millions of disheartened Democrats crying. In fact, as we enter the new year, they’re still crying. And probably will be for the next four years anyway!

Carry on world…you’re dismissed….but have a VERY HAPPY 2017!


4 thoughts on “Top Ten Stories Of 2016

  1. Well Desert, like any year it has had it’s ups and downs. As you your favorite liberal and as Jules said in Pulp Fiction, “allow me to retort” to your top ten stories.

    10. Syrian civil war with Russia as a co-star. Contrary to the Republicans mantra of we have never seen a war we didn’t like, Obama was wise to keep us out of this shit hole. At first the Republicans wanted to arm the rebels and then every crazy with an agenda in the Middle East rushed in to fight Assad. We didn’t know who was who in this tribe/clan driven world. The rebels as a group were fighting Assad to a draw until the Russkies showed up claiming to fight ISIS which we all knew was BS. One destroyed city later we have a truce brokered by Russia and Turkey with Assad nowhere to be seen in this process. The civil war is not exactly over and the picture I saw of Assad looks like he just got violated in a Chicago gay bar. Can’t wait to see how Trump handles the Russians and the Middle East.

    9. ID Theft, happened to me probably through a local hospital group when I had PT last year for my back. Had my computer hacked also, no e-mails worth it except what business man goes through bankruptcy four times and is considered a success? Guess Rex Tillerson is a failure and is not qualified for a high government position and should find a company he can wreck to enhance his resume.

    8. Renewed Cuban Relations. I have to admit that this one cracks me up from the Republican point of view. We lose 54,000 Americans, who knows how many wounded in Viet Nam and Bush the Clueless sends Grandpaw McCrackey McCain to re-establish relations with a repressive communist government. This is consequently hailed as a success and are told this puts the past behind us. We cut off relations, place an embargo in lieu of war, possibly nuclear war with Russia over Cubs and lose how many Americans in this policy? Sorry but those Cubans from the Keystone cops Bay of Pigs invasion doesn’t count. Now the Republicans are howling about a repressive communist government and how can we do this? I believe that the original refugees from Cuba are getting smaller and their opinion really doesn’t count anymore. The third generation Cubans in Miami really don’t give two toots about Castro. This is history to them. BTW, I shared an office when I was at Legal Aid with a former;y high powered during the Bastista regime. He was a nobody here, although we did have some interesting discussions and he did introduce me to Cuban cuisine.

    7.The Olympics, who cares anymore, the Russians cheat, we do well and the Today Show has the famous BS sports interview for two weeks. Yawn. World Cup is next year (2018) in Russia, who bribed their way in. Watch the mediocre U.S. team try to do something. See you at North Mountain Brewery for the matches.

    6. Cleveland Cavaliers, good for them.

    5. Chicago Cubs, that only took 58 years of my life but was worth it. I would like to see a rematch in 2017 with the Indians with both teams at full strength. Now that will be a terrific World Series. Not taking anything away from the Cubs but two points. This Cubs team was way different from past teams, they never thought they were out of the game or the Series. They had the look that we are not losing, we are just behind and this was never more evident than the last three games, you could tell just from their faces. The second was Cleveland suffered devastating losses to their pitching staff particularly late in the season. The pitchers left did an admirable job and my hat is off to them, but Tito Francona (a great manager and a former annual member of my fantasy team) had to go to the well once too often. Young team and they will be around for awhile.

    4. Iran Nuclear Deal. Sorry Desert but there are a lot of people that are smarter than you. This is a good deal as it has stopped their nuclear program, the money given to Iran was in fact theirs and we actually profit from this via Boeing, United Technologies and others. Those are American jobs dude and although the Orange Mussel is going to take credit, it was Obama baby. Europe will benefit also. As for the Death to America thing, that is political theater, sort of like the never ending Rump rallies. What’s next, the I am the president and I do not know what to do tour?

    3. Terror Attacks Around the World. With the exception of Paris and Brussels, the others were conducted by what are known as lone wolfs. How do you stop those? Difficult to say the least. As for the Orlando attack, what kind of Islamist terrorist calls 911 to announce his commitment to ISIS? It also took ISIS a couple of hours to say, yes he is one of us. The ultimate lone wolf. I would like to say that this is the first time since Rock Hudson’s death have the Republicans showed any interest in the LBGTQ community. other than passing repressive laws or ignoring the law. I’m talking to you Kim Davis and your Christian Sharia law religion.

    2. BREXIT. Right wing BS meets Buyers Remorse. May take ten years to completely break with the EU but the continent has said not to let the doorknob hit you on the bum on your way out limeys. A lot of young British voters are now wondering what exactly did we vote for and why? Too late now dudes, have fun stormin the castle.

    1. United States Presidential Election. While Snarky concedes the point that it was an upset, it was hardly a Dewey Defeats Truman, mostly because Truman was a progressive, won the popular vote and the electoral college. Il Duce on the other hand won the electoral college, a lot of pissed of white people, neo-Nazis and just plain racists, but lost the popular vote by three million. Just wait until the Republicans take away their health insurance, raise their taxes, no jobs materialize for them and learn that this con man couldn’t lead a pack of starving dogs to fresh meat. One final point, I do believe that this is the first time we have elected a mentally ill person president as defined in the DSM. Diane said she thought it was Warren Harding, but I said he was just an idiot surrounded by the extremely corrupt “Ohio Gang.” Trumpeltinskin is not my president and never will be. I’ not crying, I’m resisting.

    Wishing you and Mrs. Desert a Happy, Healthy and Prosperous New Year! See you Tuesday morning and I am still deciding which tasteless shirt to wear to introduce myself to the new Board members. Time to check on dinner.

    • Once again, you overwhelm me with your comments. Sometimes I just get the feeling you write this stuff to raise my blood pressure,…but that’s ok. We agree on Vietnam. We agree on the Cavs, and we agree on the Cubs. Other than that, you guys on the left just don’t face reality very well, do you?

      And a Happy New Year to you and the lovely lady. Can’t wait for Tuesday, should be loads of fun.

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